When it Rains
by StBerryForever
Summary: Months after Jesse left, rain comes. Rachel was left a broken heart and just some photos, a carebear, and a CD stuffed in the back of her wardrobe to prove that he was real. But the rain made her think, and after all that time, will she finally let go?
1. When It Rains

**A/N: This feautures the song 'when it rains' by Paramore, its in New Moon and if you haven't listened to it, you really should. This is just something I came up with while listening to it just now. REVIEW PLEASE! Also, please check out my story Mine! I need more inspiration for it, so please give me some ideas!**

It was raining. I sat on the fallen log by the pond, watching the ducks. They loved rain, but for me it reminded me of _him_. So, I came here, hoping for a distraction from my gloomy thoughts.

None came.

Although it had been months since _he'd _left me, and I was with Finn, there was an empty hole in my heart that had just gotten worse over time.

It wasn't fair. Finn was what I had always wanted. He was kind, and hadn't I spent months trying to get him away from Quinn?

But then, Jesse was even more than what I had always wanted. He was talented. Gorgeous. And so much more.

As soon as I thought that, I felt guilty. What about Finn? He was convinced I was over Jesse, like I'd told him months ago. He was convinced that I was fully committed to our relationship, not pining after the angel boy who had left me all those months ago.

But I wasn't over him, not really. I had been lying to everyone else in Glee club.

I had been lying to myself.

Because, the truth was, I _missed _him. I wanted him, or at least an explanation.

_And when it rains_

_On this side of town it touches_

_Everything_

_Just say it again and mean it_

_We don't miss a thing_

He had cracked an egg on my forehead. He had took my Regionals trophy.

He had taken my mother.

_You made yourself a bed_

_At the bottom of the blackest hole (blackest hole)_

_And convinced yourself that its not the reason_

_You don't see the sun anymore_

The rain fell harder. I was getting cold, but I couldn't go back, not yet.

Why did he do it? Did he ever even love me?

_And oh, oh, how could you do it?_

_Oh I, I never saw it coming_

_Oh,oh, I need the ending_

_So why can't you stay _

_Just long enough to explain._

What was Jesse doing right now? Was he thinking about me, like I was thinking about him?

Or was he in Calafornia, slowly forgetting me?

_And when it rains_

_Will you always find an escape_

_Just running away_

_From all of ones who love you_

_From everything._

Maybe he had a new girlfriend already. Maybe he had decided to leave girls altogether, and focus on his performing.

_You made yourself a bed_

_At the bottom of the blackest hole (blackest hole)_

_And you'll sleep till May_

_And you'll say that you don't want to see the sun anymore_

I swore I wouldn't do that. I loved singing - it was my life - but I was a person. I had soul.

_And oh, oh, how could you do it?_

_Oh I, I never saw it coming_

_Oh,oh, I need the ending_

_So why can't you stay _

_Just long enough to explain._

I had learnt something this year.

Never let love go for your career. You may not find it again.

_Take your time_

_Take my time_

_Take these chances to turn it around (take your time)_

_Take these chances, we'll make it somehow_

_Take these chances to turn it around (take my...)_

_Just turn it around_

I had to try to be with Finn. Jesse didn't want me anymore.

Did he?

_And oh, oh, how could you do it?_

_Oh I, I never saw it coming_

_And oh, oh, how could you do it?_

_Oh I, I never saw it coming_

_And oh, oh, how could you do it?_

_Oh I, I never saw it coming_

_Oh,oh, I need the ending_

_So why can't you stay _

_Just long enough to explain._

I slowly stood up and walked down the path in the trees, towards home.

Sometimes you just have to let things go.

_You can take your time_

_Take my time._

**A/N: So, what did you think? Not to many flames please! Thanks!**


	2. Dreaming With A Broken Heart

**A/N: Thanks to Chibi-Kari and Gemelli22 for the ideas and encouragement to continue the story. Song is John Mayers Dreaming with a Broken Heart.**

JESSE POV

Seven months, one week, and four days, I thougth as I nearly fell out of bed.

Then I groaned as I remebered my dream.

It was a simple one, one that would have meant nothing to me earlier in the year. But it was still one that I regretted waking up from.

The dream had been Rachel. And she was sitting with me by a small lake, where the sun was shining and the water was calm and clear. Again, it shouldn't have meant that much to me, as I dreamed about my lost love every single night since I left her. But this dream was different to all the other ones. So much different.

In all my other dreams, Rachel was sad. Lonely. Like she most definitely was now. She was always sitting by the same lake, except it was raining. The water wasn't as clear or calm. Usually she was crying or screaming. And every time she said the same thing.

"Why did you do it, Jesse!" she would scream at me, until I was almost crying too. She just looked so sad, so broken, and I wanted to hold her and stop her tears. Because a girl like that, so beautiful, so amazing, should not be crying.

When the dreams had first started I had tried to touch her, but she wouldn't let me. So now I just did nothing, I just stood there taking what I deserved until I would suddenly awaken.

That was the only thing that stopped me from catching the first plane back to Lima to win her back. My fear of her rejecting me like she did in my dreams.

But this last dream was amazing. Rachel was smiling, glowing, as we sat on that log together. Sunlight was shining on her hair, like she was under the spotlight. That was where she belonged.

We were laughing, but I don't know what had made us laugh so much. Maybe just the sheer joy of being together. Maybe one of us had said something funny. Now I couldn't help but wonder what it was.

Because if I knew, there is no doubt I would go straight back to Rachel and make her laugh again.

But I had only been dreaming.

_When you're dreaming with a broken heart_

_The waking up is the hardest part_

_You roll outta bed and down on your knees_

_And for the moment you can hardly breathe _

With a sigh, I broke out of my daydreams.

_Wondering was she really here?_

_Is she standing in my room?_

_No she's not, 'cause she's gone, gone, gone, gone, gone... _

I started to get dressed, but I was not focusing on what I was wearing. It was all black, anyway.

Another day of college. I had been so looking forward to it, yet now the days seemed to drag by and make me depressed.

But I knew it was Rachel making me sad, not school.

_When you're dreaming with a broken heart_

_The giving up is the hardest part_

_She takes you in with your crying eyes_

_Then all at once you have to say goodbye_

_Wondering could you stay my love?_

_Will you wake up by my side?_

_No she can't, 'cause she's gone, gone, gone, gone, gone..._

I knew I was talented, and smart. But I just didn't want to try anymore.

She was gone now.

_Now do i have to fall asleep with roses in my hand_

_Do i have to fall asleep with roses in my hand?_

_Do i have to fall asleep with roses in my hand?_

_Do i have to fall asleep with roses in my hand?_

_Baby won't you get them if i did?_

_No you won't, 'cause you're gone, gone, gone, gone, gone... _

Then I spotted something my parents had given me before I had left, should I need it anytime soon.

A return ticket to Ohio.

Right then, I knew what to do.

I grabbed my keys and pratically ran out the door, without bothering to take any luggage or tell the college I wouldn't be there today. That I hopefully wouldn't be there for a while.

Right now, I knew where I had to be.

And that was with Rachel.

_When you're dreaming with a broken heart_

_The waking up is the hardest part._

**A/N: Cool? I will continue, I just need some more ideas for who our two lovebirds will reunite. So REVIEW!**


	3. White Horse

**A/N: Chapter Three! No Jesse in this chapter, sorry.**

**But it will get a glimpse of Puck, Finn (Ugh) and Mike.**

**So please review, it makes Jon Groff happy! **

"Awesome party."

"Cute as girls, right Finn?"

"I'd say. I gave one of them my number. I wonder if she'll call me?"

"Probably not. Everyone there was smashed."

"You're just saying that cos none of them fancied you."

"Hey! That is so not true. Chicks dig me."

The boys of glee rambled on, the conversation ranging from girls to booze. But I soon lost interest. It was mostly a petty arguement between Finn and Puck about one girl they had seen, one that none of us had recognised from primary school.

Then I got an unpleasent feeling in my stomach, one that I knew all to well.

"Uh oh. Berry's off again."

"She really can't hold down her drink, can she?"

I raced up the stairs, into the Chang's bathroom. I made it just in time.

When I was done, I stayed there, staring at the contents of my stomach swirling in the porcelian bowl. Usually Finn or Mike had come with me and held my hair back as I vomited, but I guess this must be about the 18th time. So now I was pretty much alone, unless Puck wanted to come and help me, which was pretty unlikely.

I got up and rinsed my mouth, then washed my hands and stared at myself in the mirror.

I looked awful. My hair was sticking to the sweat on my face, and my eyes looked tired with great purple bags underneath them.

I was trying not to think of the reason I let the three boys take me to the party. After all, there wasn't much point, was there? He was probably halfway across the country by now. Maybe even with a new girlfriend.

That thought hurt me more than I would've liked. It had been months now, so any normal person would've moved on.

But I had never been normal. So it was bound to be harder, wasn't it?

I decided not to go back downstairs. My bag was in Mike's room, so I went in and grabbed my I-pod. Then I turned up the volume and pressed shuffle.

_Say you're sorry_

_That face of an angel_

_Comes out just when you need it to_

_As I paced back and forth all this time_

_Cause I honestly believed in you_

I nearly pressed next. I wasn't really a big fan of Taylor Swift at the moment - the lyrics seemed much to meaningful. But something stopped me, and I kept on listening.

_Holding on_

_The days drag on_

_Stupid girl,_

_I should have known, I should have known_

Huh. I was a stupid girl to let him into my heart. Me and Taylor Swift would probably get along pretty damn well.

_I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairy tale_

_I'm not the one you'll sweep off her feet,_

_Lead her up the stairwell_

_This ain't Hollywood, this is a small town,_

_I was a dreamer before you went and let me down_

_Now it's too late for you_

_And your white horse, to come around_

I don't know why I cared so much, after I had been given half a year to forget. But I guess, I was terrified at the idea of forgetting him. He had been the best thing that ever happened to me - until he went and threw eggs at me.

_Baby I was naive,_

_Got lost in your eyes_

_And never really had a chance_

_My mistake, I didn't know to be in love_

_You had to fight to have the upper hand_

_I had so many dreams_

_About you and me_

_Happy endings_

_Now I know_

But I knew I would always love him. Nothing could change that.

_I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairy tale_

_I'm not the one you'll sweep off her feet,_

_Lead her up the stairwell_

_This ain't Hollywood, this is a small town,_

_I was a dreamer before you went and let me down_

_Now it's too late for you_

_And your white horse, to come around_

Jesse and I might meet again, someday. Most likely Broadway. His words rang in my head.

Did he really mean it when he said that me being on Broadway was inevitable?

Maybe. Maybe not.

But it couldn't have all been real, could it?

_And there you are on your knees,_

_Begging for forgiveness, begging for me_

_Just like I always wanted but I'm so sorry_

_Cause I'm not your princess, this ain't a fairytale_

_I'm gonna find someone someday who might actually treat me well_

_This is a big world, that was a small town_

_There in my rearview mirror disappearing now_

_And its too late for you and your white horse_

_Now its too late for you and your white horse, to catch me now_

A small voice in the back of my head was telling me something. Could it have been real at all? Or was everything a ploy to destroy the competition?

Then I realised something. He can't have been destoring the competition. Vocal Adrenaline could destroy everyone without having to transfer the lead to another school.

So what was he doing? What else could have made him do something as big as that?

Not what. Who.

And there was only one person who could have done that. Someone who had the power to make Jesse hurt me, break my heart, break my Glee club in the process.

My mother. It had been her fault. Jesse had broken my heart under her instructions.

I ran back to the bathroom, throwing up all over again.

But my headphones were still in my ears, blasting the music, and I had not strength left to rip them out.

So I lay there, silent tears flowing down my face.

How could she have done this?

_Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa_

_Try and catch me now_

_Oh, it's too late_

_To catch me now ._

**A/N: Like it? Pretty dramatic huh?**

**Well, not really. I know Rachel might be overreacting btu remember, her heart was crushed and it was ALL HER MOTHERS FAULT! Well, sort of.**

**Anyway, reviews are greatly accepted! (I'm not sure how correct my english is. lol)**

**I need 5 reviews at least for my next chapter.**

**It will have Jesse in it...**


	4. Brick By Boring Brick

**A/N: Sorry this has taken so long! Really short chapter by the way! Reviews make me update faster. :)**

"Tea or coffee?" said a voice.

I looked up, and immediatley wanted to run away. Standing by my seat was the air hostess, the kind that I disliked. The reasons for that were, she was sickly sweet and girly, with poofy blonde hair and blue eyes, she was always hitting on me, and she just wouldn't leave me alone.

"I'm fine, thanks." I replied smoothly. There was only one girl I wanted right now, and according to the message that suddenley came over the intercom, she was two hours away.

The hostess - Candy, judging by her name tag - looked disgruntled. She twirled and walked off. I felt a slight twinge of remorse, but it was gone as soon as I thought of Rachel.

To pass the time, I picked up the nearest magazine and started to flip through it. Not much to look at, besides something about the Twilight stars dating, which was pretty funny. How many times had those two hooked up?

Even though I was bored to death, by the time I had read it from front to back it was only one hour to go. So for the next hour I read a teenage girls magazine (skipping through the period advice - that was incredibly awkward.)

Then, before I knew it, we were landing. I was nearly jumping out of my seat, and took off as soon as the doors opened.

On the way to Rachel's house, I started to get nervous. Would she even talk to me?

Well, when the door opened, Rachel stood there. At the sight of me, she looked, angry, sad, confused, and finally, pissed off. Then she stood there for a moment, and then reached out and slapped me.

"What the HELL Jesse!" she screamed. Well, at least she was talking.

I said nothing. Rachel contiued. "Do you just expect to show up, like EVERYTHING will be okay? You should have come MONTHS ago, back when you still had a CHANCE!" she yelled in my face.

"Rach. Please. We need to talk."

"We'll be TALKING alright, JERK!"

I put on my best Jesse St James smile. "I guess. It sounds like you have some things to say to me."

Then I saw her face and realised attitude was probably a bad idea. But it seemed she _did_ have more to say.

"I waited months for you!" she sobbed. "I loved you and I wanted you to come back to me!"

Wow. Girls emotions change really quickly.

I took her in my arms to comfort her, but she cried even harder. Then I pushed open the front door and carried her inside, whispering in her ear as I went. "Are your dads home?" I asked her. She just shook her head and kept sobbing. I sat on the couch and lay down with my arms around her.

After about an hour of continuous sobbing, she fell asleep in my arms. I wanted to sleep too, but I decided to wait for Rachel. We needed this talk, and I had to think of what to say. Would I tell her how I've been thinking of her everyday? How much I loved her?

Rachel slept for three more hours, and I began to worry. What if her dads came home and saw me? I knew how protective they were of their daughter. But then Rachel woke up, opening her eyes.

"Jesse?" she mumbled.

"I'm here." I whispered. But the next thing that came out of her mouth surprised me.

"I know about Shelby."

**A/N: Sorry this is extremely short, its kind of just a filler cos I haven't updated in AGES!**

**PLEASE REVIEW!**


	5. AN

**A/N: Okay, I'm really sorry this isn't an actual chapter, but I just wanted to tell anyone who actually reads my stories - and likes them - that I won't be updated for about three weeks. Its the summer holidays in New Zealand, and my family are going to a beach for a few weeks and Christmas. So I'm not dead or anything, we just won't have access to a computer there... :(**

**Anyway, I'll post something when I get back, and in the meantime, if you have any ideas for my stories, pm me or review...**

**Merry Christmas everyone, see you soon!**


End file.
